A superb memoir

Not my words, but the review in the Belfast Telegraph. Looks like Dying to Survive is making an impact north of the border.

"She writes in her superb memoir, Dying to Survive, that she suddenly felt confident. “I wasn’t going to play a role others had chosen ... I would be myself, rotten arms and all, and if you didn’t like it, you could ‘Kiss my a**e.’”

Reading her journey from 15-year-old heroin addict to recovering twentysomething mother, the defiance is understandable.

Rachael had been used and abused by men, dealers and society since embarking on her slippery slope just after primary school. Normally, 29 might be considered rather young to produce an autobiography, but Rachael has more than enough incident to fill a TV biopic or movie.

“Yes, that’s true,” she agrees, “although I haven’t been approached yet. There is loads of plot there. If I had to choose somebody to play me, it would be Mena Suvari from American Beauty — she’s quirky.”

But, Rachael adds in her light Dublin accent, she’s still trying to get her head round having produced a book. “It was traumatic to write ...”

A must read

Surfing online I found this review on Amazon about Dying to Survive.

"Very easy read. One of those where you can't put the book down once you start reading.Particularly chilling given that I live in Ireland. Refreshingly honest. I cannot bring myself to read fiction and when you have books like this to read why would you?. And it has a happy ending!.A must read for any parent."

Number One on the Bestseller list

Just heard the great news that Dying to Survive is Number One on the Irish Bestseller list! It's amazing!! Only a few weeks ago I posted that the book was at number two. I didn't think it would climb to the number one spot.

Thanks again to everyone who helped with the book: From the publisher Gill & Macmillan to all of you out there who actually bought the book.

Many thanks xxx

Family photo

This is a pic of me and my Mam. Lots of water under the bridge and it's good to have come out the other end.

Still selling

The news about Dying to Survive is really good. It's still selling well and the publishers are very happy with its progress.

Thanks to everyone who has bought the book:)

One day at a time...

The fear of failure is always there, but with each passing day spent clean and sober the worry that I will go back to the old ways recedes. Looking back at an old documentary reminds me of falling off the wagon.

At one stage in the documentary, I break down when remembering a previous failure to get clean - a four-year stretch at one stage.

"I genuinely wanted to, but I just wasn't ready for it. I have to learn to my love myself and do the right thing by me now, but it's very painful.

"This is why I was afraid to give up the drugs because I knew all this stuff would come up and every time I got clean before, I never connected with all this stuff. I could talk the talk but it was always only on a head level."

That was two years ago, a lifetime.